Once and only big event

It's an once and only big event for my family. Because of this event, or I should say a ceremony, I withdrew from the Batam's trip... *argh*

It's a whole day ceremony from morning 10am to night 10pm. It's also a very costly one... chinese tradition and it lives in the belief of almost every of my family members. It all started with....

The event was held at our old family house in Kulai... where I moved out from there since 3 years old. However, it will still be the place where our family gathering is held although my grandparents were no longer around. It's also the first stop for every weddings cos all the ancestors are placed here.

How did this idea come about? I'm not really sure. What little I know is it's 3 years ceremony for my grandfather. In the meantime, my family also took this opportunity to pray (so-called 超渡)for other deceased family members. Hence, we're basically holding this ceremony for my great grandparents, grandparent, granduncle, eldest uncle and auntie, aunt and cousin Li Qiong (and for the aborted babies....).

For me, this is time when I'd choose to play with the kids (cos there's nothing better I can do), hehe... I find that nowadays kids are trained very well in posing. When you said "可爱，可爱" to the kids, they'll usually pose like this:

Placing their hand or fingers on one side of their face .. That's very cute.

However, they are still some kids don't buy it... like this little cute girl, who's difficult to catch and is said only like guys... I hardly carry her also....

Fu Mei Mei, we all used to call her this. She's really cute when she smiles.

Some more pictures of the kids....

Tun Yee, Natalie, Amelia and Mindy

Lai Pin Cheng, who can never sit still for 5 mins.

Haven't seen this girl for long time and finally caught her for picture. She's getting prettier day by day, with a pair of super big eyes.

When it's time to burn all the "properties" we bought for our ancestors... you must be wondering what we bought... hmm... very the exaggerating, except for the mansion, the maids, big car etc... we even got this:

Aeroplane?! Oh my god.... The first thought came into my mind when I saw this was: How much have we spent today? This ceremony must have cost us around 10K I guess. Nonetheless.... all these would become ashes in the end. We're like burning our own money!

I noted a ugly belief... many think that the more you burn the higher the chances you will strike the numbers. I don't quite like this. Hence, today is also a day where the stakes are high... *Can give me all the money instead of donating to Magnum or whatever pools??*

The whole event ended at around 10 plus... as long as 12 hours... that's really tiring....

P/S: You can also read report at other media....

Another coffee session....

"Queenie, when's your last day?"
"Tomorrow..... "
"Ohh... not next Monday meh? I thought of getting you to get the FS signed on Monday. I think it's something that can make you happy before you go. By the way, any chances that you'd take back?"
*smilling*
"hmm... what's holding you back now? Is there anything I can help?"
*wordless* *smilling*
"Come... let's go for coffee..."

I had another counselling on the second last day (Gosh... still not giving up). This is the second time this AM had ever talked me around regarding my resignation. First round in office and now at Coffee Bean. I appreciate the time he spent on me. I also appreciate he actually shared his experience (he tendered before), his frustration with certain ppl and his mindset. I'm moved.

The other AM also offered me an IPO engagement. I mentioned to her that I need a break to revitalise my energy but the break would clash with the IPO engagement. She's kind enough to let me go on leave (if I were to take back the letter) and she'll also find somebody else to supervise the team during my absence. I suddenly feel that I see some light in the tunnel.

After the Japan reporting deadline, I find myself can calm down a bit and get my mind clear. I could have tendered without proper consideration. I feel better also when the stress is over. In addition, having so many rounds of counselling I feel that it's a blessing when I have managers who really care about me and offer me opportunities. There are many other ppl in the office who also suffer alone without any blessing. Many ppl also told me that I'm fortunate enough to be in one of the best mentor group which is also bu xing zhong de da xing. Some mentor managers totally bo chup about their mentees one.

What am I trying to say here? I think I'll take back the letter...... since I know that I'll be working with somebody I feel comfortable with.. who will not really stress me unlike the other manager.. why not give it a try right?

Finger pointing session...

I was trying to clear all the files borrowed under my name with filling room. Shit! I had barely found out that there's a missing file when the previous AIC transferred the file under my name. I was being careless for not checking properly when I acknowledged the receipt with filling room. Why am I so unfortunate and have to bear the wrongdoings of others because of my carelessness? I mean I am not the person who lost the file but because the file is now under my name, I'll have to search the file out by hook or by crook. That sounds really ridiculous!

Trying to push the responsibilities back to the last year team (since they're the one who didn't take good care of the files they borrowed in the first place) but ... can't find a nice way to push. This troubled me and worried me. I even woke up at 4:30am cos I dreamt myself couldn't find this missing file. Then I prayed to god... Guan Yin la... Yuan Tian Shang Di (for WHOM I asked the 签 from) hope THEY bless me to find the file today. (kind of like seeking help from gods... haha.. )

In the morning, I sent an sms to this assistant who created me a lot troubles and gave me a bad time during audit. I also want to see what he would reply me.

"Can I transfer the DMA limited review files that you found last time back to you? There are some documents not filed for which I think they're not properly tidied up. Maybe when you come back from study leave you can have a look at it? Tomorrow is my last day already. I'm not able to look through everything in the box...."

I was guessing that maybe he would not reply me. But who knows, instead of replying me via sms, he emailed me, somemore copied the manager:

Hi,
With regards to your sms this morning, please return PY's files to the filing room first and sign out once filing room confirmed their completeness and existence. I'll draw them out myself should I require it after I come back from my exams. As for those chicken working papers etc pertaining to DMA, since you don't have time to arrange it, you can put it on your desk indicating the whole lot pertaining to DMA. I'll arrange it to the respective files if necessary after I come back, if is not urgent. Thanks.

PS: Hi Michael, FYI

It's very obvious to me that he knows himself didn't pass me the complete set of files and he didn't highlight to me and that's why he'd mention "completeness & existence" in the email. Somemore, no matter I have time to arrange them or not, it has nothing to do with me as well. Those mess were created by him last year. Why should I clear all the rubbish for him? I feel that he's trying to backstab me.

I felt hopeless as I totally had no clue where could the file have gone. Come on, it's also not me who lost the file. I went to 32nd floor and searched around, but couldn't find it. I told my "neighbour" about this. He then stood up and asked me to search again and said he'd help me. Returning back to 32nd floor we started the search.... was praying in my heart: please.... god... let me find it.... 15 mins later, OH MY GOD ! I FOUND IT! I FOUND IT! Sometimes I really find that luck is always with me....

Then I shoot back an email to this senseless guy and copied my manager also:

Hi TE,

With regards to DMA limited review workpaper file for YE 30/06/2005, I'd just noticed that there's a missing file (File 1/2). Fortunate enough, I found the other file in a dusty plastic bag, with one whole lot of unfiled documents pertaining to prior year audit/ limited review (I'm not sure) at one corner at 32nd floor (I believe it's where you used to sit last time).

For your information, I've returned the limited review workpaper file to filling room. I have also left those unfiled documents relating to prior year audit/ limited review in your pigeon hole. Kindly spare some time looking at those unfiled documents and fill accordingly to respectives prior years workpaper files (YE 2005 and 2006, limited review or audit) if necessary. Thanks.

Trying to set me up eh? He're not lucky enough. Lucks don't stay with devil. While he thought himself is smart to keep manager in a loop on this... in fact he's not. He's probably forgotten he was the one who lost the file....

P/S: Thanks Catherine for offering herself to look for the file. And a big thanks to Jin Hoa who helped me to search for the file and arrowed the guy in a "professional" way. :)

It's over....

The dreadful Japan reporting deadline was finally over today. I hope everything ended today. Working on the 2 engagements concurrently was really a nightmare to me. I hardly had good sleep since the commencement of engagements on 11/04/2007. I was given only 3 days for the field works to complete; the wrapping up, clearing points from partner and EQAR was expected not more than 3 days. Ridiculous - especially when I was working with some senseless assistants. I'd been receiving messages from manager, something like this:

"This guy is not focus!"
"Can you please note this down on his evaluation form?"
"Mark this weakness down on his evaluation form!"

While he's telling me this, I was thinking..... what would he mark on my evaluation then?

This assistant deserves it. If I were the manager, I'd also WRITE HIM OFF. I think I'll hardly forget him - who had given me a very difficult times in the past 2 weeks just to clean up the rubbish and mess he created. kns.

Seeking indication from god...

Do you still remember 卜学亮 <子曰>, there is one line saying "搞不懂就问人, 搞得懂就答人, 没有人懂还可以问神"? When you cannot really make up your mind, would you think of going temple and ask for an indication? I don't... but this round, I did.

I've never been to 柔佛古庙, in order to fulfill my little wish, I decided to pay this temple a visit. (If you want to get more information about this temple, please visit http://www.jb-tionghua.org.my/gumiao/gumiao.htm)

It was very crowded today. Look as though there's a event or something which I didn't ask more. There are altogether 5 gods. 3 joss sticks are required for each praying, except for one, no joss stick is required which is the one you seek for indication. Meaning to say, you'll be getting 12 joss sticks altogether. Joss sticks are not allowed to bring into the main hall, where you seek for indication from god (求签)

After all the praying, I went into the main hall and asked if I can 求签. The person-in-charge asked me if I know how to make it... haha... I believe the guy can tell from my face that I don't know how. In case you don't know how, let me tell you how:

1. Take the 2 "half-moon" so called 圣杯 (not sure if this is how it's named in chinese, but you know what i'm referring to right?), you must ask the god whether you're allowed to seek an indication from HIM.

2. Once you throw the 2 "half moon", if they present to you that one is up and one is down, the answer is "yes".

3. Taking the 签筒, you speak from your heart to the god your name, the place you stay, your age and what you're asking and you start the "shaking" until the 签 drop out. Well.. that doesn't end...

4. Now, you must throw the 2 "half moon" again to see whether the 签 is meant for you.

That basically explains the procedure of seeking indication from god. Here goes the indication I got today:

求财未遂如君意
欲望青云又路迷
且托守旧方为吉
等待时来百事宜

It's all about the work.. Because of another counsel from my AM, I'm thinking if I should stay as they said. It's very obvious from the the words that I should stay... My mum also said that this is accurate and tells exactly the situation I'm in. This makes me more undecisive.

I read this line from newspaper yesterday. It's words from a successful entrepreneur in Taiwan, 蔡万霖. He says:
"在尽力之后，要做的就是忍耐与等待，如果不能忍耐与等待，则前面的努力，会前功尽弃."

Does it enlighten me? I don't know. I only know that my mind is in a mess now. Counting down the days... 5 more days to go...

p/s: thanks Mr D for your time. Thanks for listening to my grumbles and accompanied me to the temple. I think you're merely accompanying without intention to visit in the first place. Hehe.

Unconditional help

It was raining cats and dogs this afternoon when I was having lunch at Amoy Street. None of us brought the umbrella. I felt eager to go back cos I had stupid things to rush today but due to the rain, there's just no way we could walk back to the office at that moment. Since nothing can be done, so I might as well buy myself a drink while waiting the rain to stop (which I think it's going to rain for some time).

Went down to the coffee stall and bought a cup of Teh-C. I don't quite often have lunch at Amoy Street due to the crowds. This coffee stall was also my first time visit.

Auntie said: 小妹 (hmm.... ya.... xiao mei again.... )。。。 你要什么？
I said: Auntie, 我要Teh-C。。。 带走。。。
Auntie said: 小妹。。 拿好好。。。哇，雨下很大。。
I said: 是咯。。。
Auntie said: 你没有带雨伞啊？？你要雨伞吗？ 我借你。

I was looking at her @_@ like this. Huh? Did I hear it wrongly? She's lending me, a nobody to her, umbrella in the believe that I'll return her. Then,

I said: 可是Auntie... 我们有3个人。。。

Auntie looked around and said: 不然我借你两把， 可以吗？

@_@ UNBELIEVABLE........... then I asked if I'd need to return her by today.

Auntie said: 不用紧啦，你下次来这里吃东西的时候再还我。。 不急的。。

Ohh... I can't believe it! Bringing a cup of Teh-C and 2 umbrella, my colleagues were very shocked to see me carry 2 umbrella also. They also got a shock of their life when I told them that it's from the coffee stall lady boss.

Auntie really made my day today.. Especially when the work life was grey, auntie gave me a rainbow to balance up. I really wonder why she'd lend me the umbrella. There were so many ppl standing around and waiting the rain to stop, but why me? It's like striking toto first prize. Hehe...

Seriously I can't recall the face of this Auntie now... but I'm really thankful...

*Opps... my colleagues asked me to buy toto today since they said it's a lucky day to me... I thought of buying today's date, which was 1804.... did this number come out?? I hope it didn't...

Some encouraging words..

This guy asked me to remember what he said.... so I decided to blog it....

"表逃避...表被生活的种种的不愉快给困扰着...
人活着就是为了寻找快乐...
因为快乐而活着...
当我们察觉到自己能在困境里找到快乐时,那就意味着我们已朝快乐的方向行走了...酱就能活的更开心哦..加油"

"一但做了决定就别后悔
后悔又后悔会很烦的
所以你就要保持立场...
这是解脱..."

I cannot imagine he'll say something like this to me.... (Yes, you don't look like one.. keke) Well.... Thanks anyway...

There's another guy who said this to me: If it's a wrong move... 那就将错就错吧。。。
Hmm... although this was followed by an email like this later on:
"UBI ...........!!!!! NEXT TIME...... DON'T WASTE TIME ON THIS KIND OF"BLOG"............ WHEN U COME BACK, I WILL PUNISH U LIKE A BEAST............ " -_-

Having headache?

Find that many ppl are having headache these days... why? I myself also suffered in the past 2 days. If you don't like taking panadols like me... I have a very cool stuff to recommend:


Peace of Mind® On-the-spot relief

When the world closes in on you and your head feels a size too small, apply just two dabs on the back of your neck, temples and earlobes. You'll feel a tingling sensation as pressure, tension and tightness begin to melt away.

HOW TO USE: Place three small dabs on fingertips. Take a deep breath to experience Peace of Mind®'s stress relieving aromas. Massage into the back of neck, earlobes, and temples (closer to the hairline than to eyes.)


This was firstly recommended by Rachel (used to be an ex-colleague of mine, now we becomes colleague. 10 days later, she'll be becoming my ex-colleague again... complicated eh?) when we travelled to Hong Kong. Will it really relief your pain on the spot? It depends. Some ppl said it didn't but I still feel ok with it. At least I feel shuang after applying it. hehe.... It does help if you can't sleep due to stress. It helps you to sleep tight.

A camping idea....

I'm proposing this camping idea on behalf of Simwc. The venue and time is as follow:

Date: 21/04/07 (Saturday)
Set-off time: Between 3pm to 4pm
Venue: Desaru (what he named it 天涯海角)
Return date: 22/04/07 (Sunday)
What we're gonna do there: BBQ and camping

Background information about 天涯海角 (As much as I heard from Simwc):

This is a very inner part of Desaru which is not well-known by ppl. It used to be a place where the Raja's son played golf but it's now deserted. It is an empty land planted and mapped with the golf grass, half circle is surrounded by the sea backed by the jungle for the other half of the circle. Can imagine how beautiful is the scenery? Well.... find it difficult to imagine right? That's ok.. let me upload some photos contributed by Simwc.....

Well.... looks like an old fashion photo? hmm... I can't really link my beautiful imagination about the place to the photos presented to me... haha... No offense... Anyway, as I heard the description from Simwc myself, I can tell from his face it's a nice place to explore. So, if you think the photo is below your expectation... let's shoot the photo ourselves then!

Please register your interest here if you're joining... so that we can plan accordingly. The reason why we don't think of putting a thread on CARI is because we don't expect this a big group event. It's also for better control purpose. For those who cannot join... sorry lor... look forward to next round events! More are on the go!

*Thanks Simwc for the contributions*

*For those whose name is not listed down there, please notify through whatever way. You're invited!*

Are you joining? Please vote for your name.
	FYC
	Tothesky
	Chome
	Echoitsme
	Simpan
	Blake_Oh
	AV777
	Whymei
	Ericcy
	chenyongren92
	Jimmycsl
	光宗
	vav
	Others

A few rounds of counselling......

My mentor managers and some managers I had worked with have taken my resignation seriously... For which I feel quite bad about it. Then I had a few rounds of counselling with these managers.... trying to make me stay.. *sigh* that's really wu nai... What really shaked my mind was the IPO engagement offered by one of the manager. This is a special engagement which I have never handled before. It presented to me that it could be a very good exposure and learning opportunity. The talk with this manager actually surrounded and troubled me for a few days.....

Then I received this email from Catherine..... Here goes the conversation:

From: Chan, Catherine

Forgot to tell u I have tendered my resignation. Last day is end of this mth.
---------------------------------------------------------------
From: Foo, Queenie

i've also tendered my resignation...
last day is on 27/4
but i become so undecisive now cos i've been counselled by a few of the managers..
---------------------------------------------------------------
From: Chan, Catherine

our last day is the same!!!!!!!!
they tried to make u stay?
---------------------------------------------------------------
From: Foo, Queenie

yup...
i think ur case is pretty confirmed right?
i haven't secured myself a job before i tendered. i tendered merely bcos i'm unhappy with the environment...
i don't want to force myself to stay and work under an environment which i dun like.
somemore i don't feel that i'm moving forward hence i don't gain any job satisfaction from wat i'm doing now.
with all these factors aggregated and was also agitated by some ppl, i made this decision.
---------------------------------------------------------------
From: Chan, Catherine

of cos confirmed. i do not want to stay here too cos i am unhappy with the environment. i hate the backstabbing i hate everything here. since i have tendered everyone squeeze me. asking me to work weird hours and covering people's ass. which i do not like. i have the same feeling like u thats y i do not need to think anymore.

my dear girl, u are very daring, u did not secure yourself a job and dare to tender...... i would not be as brave as u!!!!!!
---------------------------------------------------------------
From: Foo, Queenie

i feel that i really need some rest.. even without securing a job it sounds good to me also. i can travel around also before i start hunting job. that's wat i'm thinking. and also, i think it's pretty easy to get a job in the market now.

those managers who counselled me have offered me a few options... it's worth considering. there're pros and cons though. if i were to stay, i'll need to clear up the XXX mess.. a bit sian lor..
---------------------------------------------------------------
From: Chan, Catherine

its not worth considering!!!!! sometimes they just stay becos they need people to work but whether they can deliver, is another question. u should see how they offer me to stay and after i have made my decision, everything FLIP.

wat kind of job are u looking for? mayb i can help u keep a lookout?
---------------------------------------------------------------

So this gal started to look out other opportunities for me... dropped me emails with some info of the headhunters or vacancies... Melvin also kept me in a loop of such information. Hui Hui and her hubby helped me to apply job... Then Tin referred me to the IPO team ... all these are so heart-warming. Thanks everyone... life will lead me somewhere.... :)

For my decision part..... things will somehow finalise when 27/04/07 comes......

What push me to tender my resignation

Some ppl have known that I have tendered my resignation officially on 23/03/2007. I had a gathering with the 3 girls and 1 guy, for whom 2 girls (including myself) were having troubles with work, the one and only guy were facing relationship problem. This guy... enjoyed the first freedom after 3 years locking himself in the bird cage when his gf is working on night shift.

Well, back to my resignation.... the whole story was like this....

On 23/03/2007, I received an email from the so-called RMT department:

Dear Queenie
We managed to get an A11 to do the consol for the above client. Hence you are relesaed from the job and I have booked you on Company A from Wed to Fri.
Pls let me know if there is any updates in your schedule.

The email was cc to my engagement manager.... here goes his reply:

Was she scheduled on Company A as per staffbooking?

Then, later... from this RMT again...

Dear Queenie
Noted that you have signed in unassigned today. Since there is no early notification from you regarding the schedule update hence you will have to charge to the job as per schedule. Pls let me know if you are really unassigned, I have some ad hoc assignments which urgently need a senior to help out.

Half an hour later.... it's this engagement manager email again:

Furthermore, I am aware that she was not involved full day for Company A for Wed and Thurs. Please pass her this round timesheet for my review when submitted.

One hour later...

Dear Queenie
Can you pls update your schedule for this week and next week?

WHAT ARE ALL THESE SHIT?? I've been facing all these charging problems... portfolio allocation since day 1 I joined the firm. They're just pestering me and taking up so much time to deal with. And now, the manager even want to review my timesheet. Come on, please show me some respect. I'm not kid and I know what I'm doing! I get really frustrated with this stupid system. Out of frustration, I printed the letter and put the undersign... straight-away I handed it to my HR and told this nice lady: I don't want to bear with all these anymore....

Email has changed the way we work....

Email has somehow changed the way we work in a way. It has become a way to pin point each other. It has also become a way to set aside responsilities. It has become a tool to protect oneself... When the email is sent, you can't deny that you didn't receive the email. Ppl could say that you sit on the email if you don't take any further action on the email received. Although I came across one case when I asked the Finance Manager if she received my email regarding the oustanding matter and her reply was: "Opps, sorry.... I haven't launch my mailbox for 2 days.... I didn't see your email." *deep breath* What a stupid excuse! Arent you doing business??? How could you not checking your email for 2 days during normal working hours?? And yet you call yourself Finance Manager? I feel like telling her that this is a really a stupid excuse and try to be smart next round. You can't easily cheat an auditor.. please...

Due to the nature of my job, the bulk of the work will be carried out at client's place. Hence, before you head towards client's place, the following set up is very important:

Microsoft Outlook -> Tools -> Out of office assistant

This is to ensure ppl who send you email on that day know that you're out office. So that you won't be expected to reply the stupid email until you return office. That's a way to protect oneself. Even though I have turned on this "out of office assistant", I'd still receive email like this:

* Cindy from XXX called, and asked you to call her back at 2pm*

Come on...... don't you read the returned email telling you that I'm out office and have limited internet access??? *shaking head*

Sometimes I'm also thinking that I'm safe when I turn this "out of office assistant" on so that I can actually give myself an excuse when I didn't reply manager's email (pretending that I didn't read it). Who knows.... I received this email from one of my manager:

*Please note that DT policy is to check email at least once every day*

#$%$%^$&^&..... what and what now?? email is a killer !! I hate it!

First blog

I finally set up my blogspot since the very first time I talked about this to drums (long long time ago which I couldn't remember myself also). I said to him that I read blogs but I don't write. I also mentioned that blogging a way to record our life. He said: why not? just blog! To record your life. Well... my reply to others will usually be: I have no time.

Since I started working as auditor, I have used to put up with this excuse. Am I really running out of time? It's an excuse somehow, I know. When you keep telling yourself that you have no time, you'll really have no time for other things other than work. So I decided to do something for myself, telling myself I have time in a way. Since I have been experiencing some dramatic changes in my life recently, I also want it to be recorded. :)

How would I name my blog as "Somewhere I belong"? 人生中最难的就是摆正自己的位置，抚平自己的心态，走好自己的路. I read this somewhere at wsj's blog. Yeah.... I agree..... As I'm always in a position whereby I wonder if I'm getting to the right track or am I making a right move. Well, quoting wsj's sentence: life will lead you somewhere. Reading others' blogs I know that, the little blog space will somehow be a space where one's belong... where you release your thoughts, your stress, your feelings and your sharings.. That's how I got the name.

I was trying to use veerla.blogspot.com as the url... geez... the address is not available!! Who else will be using this indian-like name? So I went to check out who is this guy with great mind alike... hee... you may check out too if you're curious ... :) But again... don't get mixed up.... let me remind you that my blog is at http:\\veerla-space.blogspot.com 谢谢赏脸